Who voted for these idiots?

37 OF THE DFL BILLS FROM FEBRUARY 01-08

1. CRIMINAL POSSESSION OF KETCHUP: Rep. Andy Welti (DFL-Plainview) has introduced a bill to impose severe criminal penalties if you “carry, use, or possess” a glass container on a watercraft or along Minnesota’s public waters. You could get 270 days in jail if you have a picnic on the lake and bring glass bottles of ketchup, mustard, and relish. If you have a six-pack of Buddy’s Cola from New Ulm on your pontoon boat, you would face 540 days behind bars, because each bottle would be a separate offense under the precise language of the bill. If you bring a jar of cold cream when you go sunbathing, you could do 90 days for that misdemeanor. Rep. Welti said he introduced the bill as an anti-littering proposal, but his bill outlaws mere “possession” of the deadly glass containers. (House File 522)

2. ILLEGAL ALIENS WELCOME; BADGERS GO HOME!: Rep. Debra Hilstrom (DFL-Brooklyn Center) has proposed giving in-state college tuition to illegal aliens who file a paper saying there are applying to legalize their immigration status. The same bill would scrap reciprocity agreements for students from Wisconsin or other states that give students a lower tuition rate. (House File 682)

3. YOU CANNOT DRIVE BY YOURSELF, BUT YOU CAN VOTE: Rep. Phyllis Kahn wants to expand her earlier efforts and amend the constitution to allow 16-year-olds to vote in all state and local elections. (House File 630). why does phyllis insist on discriminating against 15 year olds. If you are old enough to have puberty you are old enough to.....

4. NO NEED FOR I.D. TO VOTE, BUT MUST SHOW I.D. TO USE CREDIT CARD: Rep. Scott Kranz (DFL-Blaine) would require firms to see a photo I.D. before accepting a credit card. The bill would also allow the Attorney General to go after any business that may have accepted a credit card without I.D., and collect the full cost of the investigation and attorneys fees. (House File 628).

5. A CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT TO HEALTH INSURANCE: Rep. Tom Huntley (DFL-Duluth) has proposed a constitutional amendment. It would state: “Every Minnesota resident has the right to health care. It is the responsibility of the governor and the legislature to implement all necessary legislation to ensure affordable health care.” (House File 683)

6. YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO A CLEAVER: Rep. Rick Hansen (DFL-South St. Paul) would create a statute to define the rights of employees of meatpackers to include the right to written job descriptions, descriptions of salaries, and “adequate time for necessary bathroom breaks.” The bill would also create a state bureaucracy to guarantee these rights. (House File 643).

7. ZEE MOOSEN DOY-CHA SPREKKEN, KLEINAH KINDAH!: Rep. Loren Solberg (DFL-Grand Rapids) would require six weeks of summer school for students in grades 1-4 to learn a foreign language. (House File 623).

8. CHILD PROTECTION IN SHOPPING CARTS: Rep. Mike Jaros (DFL-Duluth) has proposed a requirement that every shopping cart in Minnesota must be equipped with “a strap, device, or piece of equipment designed, using reasonable engineering standards, to prevent a child from falling out of a shipping cart. This meaningful bill does not include penalties for failure to provide helmets and fire-proof suits for riders. (House File 620).

9. WINNER TAKES ALL, UNLESS THE DFL IS UNHAPPY: Rep. Kent Eken (DFL-Twin Valley) has proposed a constitutional amendment to allow the Legislature to decide who is the winner in a race for state-wide offices, judgeships, and the Legislature if the leading candidate gets less than 50% of the vote. (House File 600)

10. KNOCK, KNOCK! THE BABY INSPECTORS ARE HERE: Rep. Carolyn Laine (DFL-Columbia Heights) would require government investigators to visit every new mother in the hospital or at home to inquire whether they new about all the requirements of a new mother and all the programs that government offers on such topics as WIC, child abuse, and immunizations. (House File 595)

11. FREE EDUCATION TO TREAT CULTURAL MINORITIES: Rep. Neva Walker (DFL-Minneapolis) wants taxpayers to forgive college costs for people who provide mental health services to clients from cultural or ethnic minorities through a non-profit organization for three years. (House File 575)

12. KEEPING GOVERNMENT GOING ON AUTO-PILOT: Rep. Bernie Lieder (DFL-Crookston) wants to take the pressure off the Legislature to get its work done by allowing all state agencies to keep going even if the Legislature does not approve funding for them. (House File 534)

13. RAISING YOUIR INSURANCE COSTS FOR WHAT?: Rep. Cy Thao (DFL-St. Paul) wants to raise everyone’s health insurance costs by requiring every insurance policy to cover amino-based coverage for maple syrup urine disease, milk intolerance, reflux disease, and other conditions. (House File 529)

14. MOVING CONVICTED PERVERTS TO THE SUBURBS: Rep. John Lesch (DFL-St. Paul) wants to draw stay-away zones in such a way that large concentrations of convicted Level II and Level III sex offenders in Minneapolis and St. Paul will have to move to the suburbs. (House File 476)

15. TWO DAYS OF PAID LEAVE FOR BOYFRIENDS: Rep. Joe Mullery wants to give up to two days of paid leave each year for “significant others” who live in a household with a child to attend school meetings or deal with student-related meetings. (House File 744)

16. SCHOOLS MAY GIVE NATURO-PATHIC MEDICINE: Rep. Larry Hosch (DFL-St. Joseph) would allow schools to administer physician-prescribed “naturo-pathic medicine. the treatment of disease through the stimulation, enhancement, and support of the inherent healing capacity of the person. Methods of treatments are chosen to work with the patient's vital force, respecting the intelligence of the natural healing process. (House File 748)

17. FREE GED FEES FOR THE “PRECARIOUSLY HOUSED”: Rep. Frank Hornstein (DFL-Minneapolis) would waive the test fee for GED tests for persons who are “precariously housed,” without defining the term. (House File 751)

18. MOVING SLUMS TO THE SUBURBS AND SMALL TOWNS: “For the purpose of promoting economic diversity throughout Minnesota and to alleviate the concentration of low-income households in high poverty areas,” Rep. John Lesch (DFL-St. Paul) would create a tax incentive to provide more low-income housing in working-family suburbs and rural communities. (House File 777)

19. WILL THERE BE BACKGROUND CHECKS ON THIS?: Rep. Erin Murphy (DFL-St. Paul) wants to create grants for “family, friends, and neighbors” to gather pre-school children together to read them books. (House File 796)

20. YOUR GOVERNMENT DOES NOT KNOW “MANURE”: Rep. Al Juhnke (DFL-Willmar) wants to create a Fertilizer Research and Education Council, a Fertilizer Education Program, and a set of grants programs about fertilizers. (House File 652).
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21. SHOOT YOUR CAR: Rep. Melissa Hortman (DFL-Brooklyn Park) wants to make it the state’s transportation policy to have “the least possible adverse impact on the environment.” That means, no cars for you. (House File 639).

22. SEX ED FOR KINDERGARTEN: Rep. Neva Walker (DFL-Minneapolis) would authorize school districts to provide Students in K-12 with “age-appropriate materials that address varied societal views on sexuality, sexual behaviors, pregnancy, and sexually transmitted infections, including HIV, in an age-appropriate manner.” The bill would require such instruction for grades 7-12. (House File 615).

23. SEAWEED CONTROL ACT: Rep. Bev Scalze (DFL-Little Canada) would require all anglers and waterfowl hunters to check a box and promise to remove all aquatic plant material from boats and trailers. There is no enforcement mechanism in the bill. (House File 755)

24. LET’S GO TO PERKINS: Rep. Al Doty (DFL-Royalton) wants $500,000 to build a regional community center in Upsala. An alternative would be to give $1,200 to each of the 413 residents of Upsala for pancakes at Perkins. (House File 757)

25. CASH BONUSES FOR LOW-INCOME ALIENS: Rep. Steve Simon (DFL-St. Louis Park) wants to give cash bonuses to illegal aliens. The bill would create a tax credit for English classes, citizenship classes, and application fees. If an alien’s tax bill is lower than the cost of these expenses, the bill would give the balance of the credit to the aliens in cash. (House File 747).

26. KEEPING THE NEST FULL FOR SIX MORE YEARS: Rep. Diane Loeffler (DFL-Minneapolis) wants to raise everyone’s insurance costs by requiring all insurance policies to cover all “dependent children” until age 25 on their parents’ policies. The current law requires coverage only until age 19, unless the “child” up to age 25 is a full-time student. (House File 475)

27. UNCLE RALPH IS TOO FAT, BRING IN THE HOIST: Rep. Patti Fritz (DFL-Faribault) would require every hospital, clinic, nursing home and medical facility to ban employees from lifting or assisting patients to their feet. Instead they would have to purchase hoists, “engineering controls, lifting and transfer aids, or mechanical assistive devices.” Employees could lift patients in an emergency.” (House File 712)

28. EVEN EASIER TREATMENT FOR ILLEGAL STUDENTS: Rep. Carlos Mariani is proposing an even easier route for illegal aliens to get in-state tuition than under Rep. Hilstrom’s House File 682. Under Rep. Mariani’s version, illegal aliens would get discount tuition if they spent three years in a Minnesota high school, earned a GED, and promised to file to become resident aliens at their earliest possible opportunity. (House File 722)

29. LENIN IS DEAD, BUT HE IS MAKING A COMEBACK: Rep. Joe Mullery wants judges to decide what is an “unconscionable” price for any good or service during an “abnormal market disruption” and impose fines of up to $35,000 for each sale at this “unconscionable” price. (House File 740)

30. CYBER-BULLYING: Rep. Debra Hilstrom (DFL- Brooklyn Center) wants to require all school districts to adopt written policies against all bullying or intimidation of any students, including all forms of “intimidation and bullying in all forms, including, but not limited to, electronic forms and forms involving Internet use.” (House File 504)

31. WHAT PART OF “VOLUNTEER” IS UNCLEAR?: Rep. Tom Tillberry (DFL-Fridley) wants a $2,400 tax break for parents who volunteer at their children’s schools. (House File 477)

32. AT THREE YEARS OLD, TEST FOR KINDERGARTEN Rep. David Bly (DFL-Northfield) wants to test parents of children from birth to age three to see that their three-year-old children will be ready for kindergarten. (House File 585)

33. NO VOTING FOR “AMERICAN IDOL” ON A CELL PHONE: Rep. Sandy Masin (DFL-Eagan) wants to ban cell phone companies from charging users for payments to third parties called by the user. The bill would also require the cell company to explain its contracts in writing. (House File 635).

34. $4 MILLION FOR A VOLLEYBALL COURT: Rep. Kim Norton (DFL-Rochester wants $4 million of bonds for a volleyball facility in Rochester. (House File 624).

35. BE A MARIJUANA FARMER: Rep. Tom Huntley (DFL-Duluth) has the marijuana bill. If you convince your doctor that you have severe or chronic pain, you could get a license to grow 12 marijuana plants while holding 2.5 ounces of marijuana leaves and any amount of stems and other parts or prior plants. If the police seize your plants, the state will reimburse you for the fair market value of the seized materials, even if your costs were lower than street value. (House File 655).

36. I THOUGHT THAT WAS THE LEGISLATURE’S JOB: Rep. David Bly (DFL-Northfield) wants to create a study by bureaucrats to identify all the legislation necessary to “develop a strategy to obtain the maximum economic benefit for the state and its citizens from the renewable energy activities.” (House File 660).

37. DON’T HAVE A COW, MAN. JUST HALF A COW!: Rep. Andy Welti (DFL-Plainview) would give limited interest loans to pay for half of a cattle herd. The loans would be up to $100,000 to farmers who buy up to 200 cows, and would not require any repayments in the first year and no payments of interest in the second year. The seven-year loans would be covered by the personal notes of the borrowers. (House File 666).